In light of the financial crisis : Investment tips for 2008
With all the turmoil in the financial markets today, including the collapse of Lehman Bros and the acquisition of Merrill Lynch by Bank of America, this might be some good advice. For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected wave of corporate mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some big bucks.
Watch for these consolidations later this year:
Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W R. Grace Co. Will merge and become: Hale, Mary, Fuller, Grace.
Polygram Records, Warner Bros., and Zesta Crackers join forces and become: Poly-Warner Cracker.
Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco, and Dakota Mining will merge and become: ZipAudiDoDa .
FedEx is expected to join its competitor, UPS, and become: FedUP.
Fairchild Electronic s and Honeywell Computers will become: Fairwell Honeychild.
Grey Poupon and Docker Pants are expected to become: PouponPants.
Knotts Berry Farm and the National Organization of Women will become: Knott NOW!
And finally…
Victoria ‘s Secret and Smith &Wesson will merge under the new name: TittyTittyBangBang
